He continued to back that statement up in the months that followed as, every step of the way, he made space for what she needed to do to launch her business. He watched the kids, listened, encouraged, celebrated, asked questions, gave money, and let her know that he was still with her no matter what - all while working full time at his own job.
To see him running the grill at her pop-up dinner, taking a back seat and letting her shine up front, was really moving. He even made a speech in front of the 31 people who showed up for this event, saying how proud of her he was and how he knew that this was only the beginning.
Behind many a wild woman is a wild man cheering her on. Today’s blog post is dedicated to those men. I want to celebrate them, honor them, and give you wild women a few tips about how to work with the man in your life - whether he is initially supportive or not (or even whether he currently exists in your life or not!)
Note: This can absolutely still apply to lesbian couples, as I find that most same-sex couples still have one partner who presences the masculine energy more, and one who presences the feminine more. This is for the men and the masculine in all of us, regardless of our genitals or sexual orientation.
I suppose it’s only fitting that I begin with my man. Unlike my first two husbands and all of my past partners, Omar meets me. With him I feel seen, celebrated, and loved. He never, ever tells me that I’m “too much,” but instead tells me to get as big and bright as I possibly can. He is not intimidated by my power or big vision, because he’s got power and big visions of his own. And he does not view my emotional breakdowns as “crazy,” but as necessary growing pains on my path to even more greatness.
He makes space for my tears, my ideas, my visions, and my love. I believe he is able to do this because he has done and continues to do his own work. He is not hitching himself to my rainbow and expecting me to lead him to glory. He is not looking to me to be his mother or savior or whatever else. He is a conscious, awake, and responsible adult, completely available and willing to be in an adult relationship. Thank. God. Finally.
You can read more about how I manifested a man like him in my blog post from March, “I’m Engaged! And Why That’s Especially Amazing…
While having a mature, loving, supportive partner certainly is a beautiful thing that I wish for all of my clients, let’s be honest - that’s not always the case. But even then, there is hope. There is always the opportunity for an empowered choice, and it is up to us to make it so.
For example, another one of my wild women has a husband who, I’ll be honest, is not always supportive. He has moments of getting it together and saying, “Yes honey, I’m here for you and believe in you,” but he also has moments of saying, “What is this crazy thing you’re doing! You should be here at home with the family!” or any other version of trying to put his fears on to her.
But you know what? This is giving her a necessary opportunity to grow in her ability to lovingly set limits and take responsibility for her own happiness, her own career path, and her own life. Even when her husband doesn’t understand her choices, she holds the vision and carries on. It is her steadfastness that speaks loudest. After all, we show people how to treat us by what we are willing to tolerate, right?
Another one of my wild women has an ex-partner/co-parent who, although he has been difficult and downright malicious in the past, has been showing up to support her in the form of being flexible about their childcare situation so she can pursue her business with more ease. Progress!
And yet others are currently without partners - which, despite how it might feel to them sometimes - is definitely not a bad thing. A partner can bring many joys, but also possible distraction, and definitely a whole new learning curve of presence and awareness. If you are a single wild woman at the moment, I invite you to embrace it fully for the gift it is for as long as it lasts. Like everything in life, it will not last forever.
The universe has a way of giving us exactly what we need in order to learn whatever is necessary to evolve into our highest selves.
Sometimes that is a supportive relationship to expand into, sometimes it is a partner who is more of a challenge than a joy, and sometimes it is a period of singlehood. Lord knows I’ve learned some relationship lessons the extra-messy way, and had my share of single, celibate years that I thought would never end.
In conclusion, if you have a partner who needs “convincing” to support your dreams, here is my advice: You don’t need anyone’s permission to pursue your dreams, including his. If you want his support, invite him to join you from your inspired, empowered place, rather than stooping down to enable his fears.
If you have a partner who has proved to be a stumbling block in your path more often than a joyful support, it might be time to ask yourself what you’re getting from continuing the partnership. Are these lessons you’re still willing to learn, with this man, in this way? Or are you ready to call it complete and call in a different kind of love?
And finally, if you are the man in the relationship reading this, ask yourself what you’ve done lately to show your wild woman that you believe in her. If you know you’ve done a not-so-great job up until this point but she’s still with you, it’s not too late to start. If you’re not sure what you could do, ask! And if you’ve excelled in this department, thank you.
Thank you to my beautiful husband, whom I fall more in love with every day - especially on days we fight! Thank you to all the men who have helped me grow, through all the crazy shenanigans, in whatever form that growth has taken. I bless the time we had together, and am overjoyed that is complete! Now I get to spend the rest of my life with Omar.
And thank you to the brilliant, wild, masculine partners of all the wild women out there. We see you. We love you. We need you. Keep shining, and supporting us to do the same.
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Hello! I'm Melanie Munir, founder of Professional Wild Woman - a women's empowerment business dedicated to helping women who are tired of feeling either "too much" or "not enough" to connect to their inner wildness so they can create work that allows them the fullest expression of their unique voice. Welcome!